Self-doubt is a prominent attitude among youths of these days. It is a troubling and persuasive voice in our head that hold us back from doing certain things. Doubt denies you the opportunity of seizing opportunities, starting or finishing things.
It leaves you open to your own criticism that you end up finding nothing good in yourself. Shakespeare once said, “Our doubt are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt.” If we don’t try out the things, we need to do; we may never know what they feel like.
We often experience self-doubt in every single thing we do. As humans, there is always this mindset of having doubt in whatever thing we do. We ask ourselves: Am I making the right choice? Do I have the knowledge to do this? Am I getting it right? Other times we doubt our instincts and even our future.
Most times self-doubt comes due to pressure; from friends, family, peer group, society etc. We as humans are always capable of doing whatever thing we put our minds to do, but when doubt sets in, then there is a setback.
It makes us scared of doing or saying the wrong things, but it is important to note that there is no such thing as wrong. The only wrong thing is not making a choice at all, but that’s not to say we might get the outcome we visualize.
Self-doubt arises from too many expectations and pressure. Even as kids, we had doubted a lot of things about ourselves before entering adulthood. We are expected to be perfect, do everything right, be of the best behaviour, have outstanding grades in school and criticized openly for our mistakes.
We are pressurized, and these pressures turn us to our own critics. And some times we begin to ask ourselves, can I do this? Can I do that? What if everything goes wrong? What if I fail? All these are questions we ask ourselves due to doubt. But the good thing is we can deal with doubt and create a positive mindset for ourselves.
How to overcome self-doubt
This is the first step in conquering self-doubt. When your inner doubts start coming up, be quick to stop them. Don’t allow your inner thoughts to spin out of control.
It will be hard in the beginning, but when you notice you are beginning to talk to yourself negatively, and you understand what they might lead to, you need to tell yourself to stop.
Tell yourself there is no way you are going down that lane by so doing you can disrupt that doubt pattern from taking over your inner thoughts.
Take a good look at your past
Ask yourself; how many occasions when I doubted myself and had a negative thought due to fear did it really happen after taking that decision? The answer is probably not often. If you look past your doubts and see how well things have gone despite your self-doubts, it becomes easier to ignore them and focus on the positive aspect of that decision you are about to take.
Those negative thoughts are actually not real
One thing we should note is that doubt is only a thought and a belief. Some times we create ideas about ourselves which are basically not true. Some of these thoughts are the results of harsh criticisms.
Most of them are being influenced based on the subject, our environment or our moods. Self-doubt are most often just monsters in your head that your mind uses to keep you within your comfort zone and stop you from making changes.
Self-soothing and praise
Remember, you are not a failure because you failed. Setbacks happen to everyone who takes chances. Sometimes things turn out great and sometimes they don’t. Learn to cheer yourself up when you are feeling down or being swallowed up by negativity tell yourself everything would be ok.
Change negativity to neutrality
When those negative thoughts start coming, be strong enough to resist them. Instead of thinking with negative slant think positively. Remember all the success you have had and how you overcame all the obstacles. Challenge yourself to create a positive mindset and use positive terms.
Get a boost of optimism
Let someone’s enthusiasm, positivity and optimism flow through you – read books, spend time with an audiobook or a podcast. Look to your mentors and all they have achieved. Learn more about other people who were able to overcome their self-doubt and get motivated to do so.
Ask yourself what’s the worst that can happen
Examine yourself very well if you do that thing which you are doubtful of can you deal with the outcome? If you can, then there is no need to worry because most of our worries are a waste of time.
Remember, people don’t care much about what you say or do
when you worry about what others may say or think if you do something, then the self-doubt can quickly grow stronger, and get you stuck in inaction and fear.
A good meditation will help to calm and soothe your nerves from all the negativity. Sit down, take a deep breath and think thoroughly about that thing you want to do you will see that your doubts are due to fear.
Talk to someone about it
when you keep your feelings and thoughts on the inside, they can become distorted and exaggerated and not much in line with reality or reasonable expectations. This is very true when it comes to self-doubt. Talk to a trustworthy friend or family member about your self-doubt lead them into the light. If you can’t find any, there’s no harm in speaking with a counsellor.
Just saying them out aloud often help you to hear how exaggerated these thoughts have become. And by sharing this doubt with someone supportive, you can get a change in perspective.
Don’t get stuck in the comparison trap
Avoid comparing yourself to other people’s achievement and success; this gives room for self-doubt. Compare yourself to yourself to see how far you have come and what you’ve overcome. And to see how you’ve kept going, succeeding and grown as a human being. You would be shocked to see that you’ve made a lot of progress.