Is friendship before dating a good idea? Most times, we find it difficult to accept that the person they have feelings for, do not feel the same way towards us, and tend to push our intentions towards them, trying to prove the need to be in an intimate relationship. In most cases, the person may see a potential partner in us but wants to be our friend to understand us better. This often makes us dissatisfied, and we may feel “not good enough,” frustrated and depressed as a result.
Because of our sincere intentions of being in a relationship, we become carried away trying to convince them that being friends isn’t good enough for us and fail to see the possibility of getting into the relationship through causal friendship. But is developing a healthy friendship before the relationship a good idea?
In most cases, developing friendship before dating is for the benefit of both parties, and here are seven reasons why:
1. Friendship before dating helps you know yourselves better
When you start with friendship, you get to learn about the person without having to worry about getting your heartbroken if they choose not to be serious with the relationship.
You also have the opportunity to do certain things you’ll rather have not done if you were emotionally attached, such as walking away from the relationship if you find out the person has some flaws you can’t live with.
Furthermore, It’s better to find out reasons you may not want the relationship during the friendship phase, rather than when you have emotionally connected with the person. Friendship before dating ensures that your initial infatuation wears off with time, and you genuinely get to know them.
2. You can be yourself
There would be no reason for a pretense to gain the person’s approval. Most times, people end up pretending to be who or what they are not just to impress the person they love; this may lead to the end of the relationship in some cases.
However, when you start as being friends, you can be yourself and also allow the person to love you for who you are. If your crush doesn’t like your real personality, the chances of having a smooth going relationship are slim.
By being “just friends, “you can quickly opt-out of the thought of a relationship and move on with your life.
3. You feel less obliged to communicating
Most couples expect to hear from each other as much as possible, and some may get furious if their partner fails to answer or reply to their call and messages. This makes one fill obliged to communicate and can make a relationship stressful, especially when the couple is still getting to know each other.
However, starting as friends give you the leisure to communicate in your free time. It also helps you bond more with your partner, as every communication would be made worthwhile.
4. You keep your expectations in check
Some people may become so obsessed with a new relationship and begin to expect more than their partner could deliver. These unrealistic expectations could ward off the person and end the relationship.
By choosing friendship before dating, you get the chance to know the person’s capacity, what they can and can’t do, which makes it easy to set your expectations and avoid unrealistic ones.
5. You get to decide if being friends is better than dating.
When you get to spend more time with the person through friendship before dating them and get to know them better, you stand a better chance of deciding whether the person is the perfect one to date or not. You can also choose to keep the relationship casual and date someone else. In contrast, it may be difficult to quit an ongoing relationship when you learn more about your partner while dating.
6. You can date other people
There are no strings attached when it comes to friendship before dating; this means you have the free will to get to know other people and date them if you end up liking them. You don’t owe your crush any explanation about your decisions and can feel free around other people. However, if you jump into a relationship without being friends first, you may feel tied or obligated to your partner.
7. You don’t have to convince them to like you
Being in a relationship with someone who doesn’t have the same feeling as you can be frustrating. If you like the person, you may put all your effort and resources into the relationship, to convince them to like you.
However, when you start off as friends, you would have no reason to try to persuade them. Instead, you allow them to know and love you for who you are.
Choose friendship before dating has a lot of advantages to it, and would be for the best interest of you and the person you love. The best part, is that there would be nothing superficial about the relationship, and you both have the opportunity to learn about each other before considering dating.